Amiels Journal volume 1

Cover Amiels Journal volume 1
Amiels Journal volume 1
Henri Frdric Amiel
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I gave myself to meditation a very necessary defence against the dispersion and distrac- tion brought about by the day's work and its detail. Read a part of Krause's book, Urbild der Menschheit, 6 which answered marvellously to my thought and my need. This philosopher has always a beneficent effect upon me ; his sweet religious serenity gains upon me and invades me. He in- spires me with a sense of peace and infinity. Still, I miss something common wor- ship, a positive religion, shared with ot...her people. Ah ! when will the Church to which I belong in heart rise into being ? I cannot, like Scherer, content myself with being in the right all alone. I must have a less solitary Christianity. My religious needs are not satisfied any more than my social needs, or my needs of affection. Generally I am able to forget them and lull them to sleep. But at times they wake up with a sort of painful bitterness. ... I waver between languor and ennui, between frittering myself away on the infinitely lit- tle, and longing after what is unknown and distant.

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