Average Jones

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Mr. Robinson? This is Mr. A. Jones. You hear me?" "Yes, Mr. Jones. What is it?" "Integer vitae, scelerisque-purus. " "I--I--beg your pardon!" "Non egit Mauris jaculis nec arcu. " "This is Mr. Robinson: Mr. William H. Rob--" "Nec venenatis grasida sag--Hello! Central, don't cut off! Mr. Robinson, do you understand me?" "God knows, I don't!" "If he doesn't recognize the Integer Vitae, " said Average Jones in aswift aside to Bertram, "he certainly wouldn't know the more obscureLatin of the late Mr.... Hadrian. " "One more question, Mr. Robinson. Is there, in all your acquaintance, any person who never goes out without an attendant? Take time to think, now. " "Why--why--why, " stuttered the appalled subject of this examination, andfell into silence. From the depths of the silence he presently exhumedthe following: "I did have a paralytic cousin who always went out in awheeled chair. But she's dead. " "And there's no one else?" "No. I'm quite sure. " "That's all. Good-by. " "Thank Heaven! Good-by.

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