Choice Humor for Reading And Recitation

Cover Choice Humor for Reading And Recitation
Choice Humor for Reading And Recitation
Charles C Charles Chalmers Shoemaker
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Spoopendyke, soothingly. " You'd be sure to catch cold if you went out ; and by and by we'll have a piping liot dinner " "That's it!" squealed Mr. Spoopendyke, bounding out of his chair and plunging around the room. " You d got to say something about a pipe ! I knew how . T would be ! You want me to die ! You want me to smoke myself into an early grave ! You'll fetch it ! Don't give yourself any uneasiness ! You're on the track !" and Mr. Spoopendyke buried his face in his hands and shook convu...lsively.
" I meant it for the best, my dear, " murmured Mrsi Spoopendyke. " I thought I was drawing " "That's it!" ripped Mr. Spoopendyke. "Drawing! You've driven me to it instead of keeping me from it. You know how it's done ! All you need now is a light- ning rod and a dish of milk toast to be an inebriates' home ! Where's that cigar I left here on the mantel ? Gimme my death warrant! Show me my imported doom ! Drag forth my miniature coffin !" and Mr. Spoopendyke swept the contents of the shelf upon the floor and howled dismally.


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