Rogers-Isms, the Cowboy Philosopher On the Peace Conference

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(What a truththat turned out to be) Well by this time Congress was getting pretty rough so PresW grabbed his boat and commuted back home, Said I think I will land in BOSTON the old Pilgrim Fathershad pretty fair luck, and _nobody has ever landed theresince_, Germany couldent figure out how America could get troopsover there and get them trained so quick they dident knowthat in our manual there is nothing about RETREATING andwhen you only got to teach an Army to go one way you can doit in half t...he time, I feel pretty proud over that last little gag, As I used itbefore Pres Wilson in Washington and he repeated it in hisBoston speech, Saying "as one of our AMERICAN HUMORISTSsays, " Up to then I had only been an ordinary Rope thrower, _Pretty tough when the Pres cops your act, _ Pres had pretty good luck on that 1st trip they saw his 14points and raised him -------- ---- more Says in there, "There is to be no more wars" and then therewas a Paragraph a little further down told you where to getyour AMMUNITION in case there was one, Now he come's back to Washington to explain the _LEAGUE OFNATIONS_ to Congress You know those guys cant read anythingand understand it, But after eating out of 15 million dollar Gold Plates andhobnobbing with Kings and Dukes can you imagine how Congresslooked to him when he come back, Had All the Senators up to dinner at White House Took HamLewis three days to dress for it, _Not much news from the Dinner Burleson copped the Phones, _ On last day went up to Capitol to sign all the billsCongress had passed Well after he had signed the _bill_, Then he went before Congress and balled out the WILFUL 37, he was busier than Mcadoo with a new train, HE and Taft both spoke on same stage first time Pres andx-pres ever _agreed_, I still wanted to go along but he said: "wait Will till someother trip and I will take you, " You know _13_ is his lucky number if they dont sign this upon this trip he knows they will on his 13th trip, You see Congress got sore cause he did not call them inextra session, You know the next Con, is _Republican_, Be agood joke on them if he dident call them at all wouldent it, Back to Paris to meet Col House the only man the Pres everlistened too, MR DANIELS went over.

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