Sultry With a Twist (2012)

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The rift had rocked the county, pitting brother against brother, much like the Civil War, but far more serious. These pious soldiers fought for everlasting glory, as opposed to something as trivial as states’ rights. The Sultry Springs Holy War raged on for six months, until the Jazzercise instructor ran off to Vegas with her boyfriend. Then, with their heads hung in defeat, the defectors returned home and rejoined the flock. Nowadays, if a person wanted his soul saved, there was only one option...: Holy Baptism by Hellfire.
    June brushed her fingertips against the shiny oak pew, polished to a high gloss by hundreds of bottoms and decades of use. Years ago, she and Luke had squirmed in these pews and found ways to amuse themselves during the long sermons: passing notes, playing tic-tac-toe or rock-paper-scissors, and her favorite distraction—replacing the nouns and adjectives in the church bulletin with dirty ones. Mr. Peterson’s white corn for sale, you shuck it!


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