The Circuit Rider On Foot Or My First Year in the Ministry

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All this time I was try- ing to hold meeting in Graves with my hands and feet tied. After two weeks of my own revival I stopped what I had even started, if there was anything to stop. I had prayed for them and had tried to talk with them and, having done all I could, I was confident that my object was pure, and that I was not to be blamed so much for my seeming failure.
And, yet, I did take all of the blame myself. Having failed I thought that the whole fault was with me, and that God had forsa
...ken me, and that I was not worthy to be a minister. It seemed to me that if God cared for me, and I was his servant, that he would not let me be de- feated so utterly. I hung my "harp upon the willows" and sat down and wept. I thought that when God would not help me there was no use in my trying to be a preacher, so I was ready to give up the work. I went to Graves with my head up, and my heart full of confidence in a certain and easy victory over old Jericho, and I came back from there with my head under my arm and my heart down in my boots, and no sign of a victory.

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