The Good, the Bad And the Furry: Life With the World's Most Melancholy Cat And Other Whiskery Friends

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Or, as it might have seemed to you, had you never met Janet before and arrived upon the scene as an innocent: a large tanker of vomit had swerved off the road and into my garden, shedding its entire load in the process, and now my cat Janet was inspecting its contents. I knew better than that. Ever since he’d first bounded clumsily into my life a decade earlier, Janet – who was actually a large man cat – had been a master puker, a veritable titan of regurgitation. It had nothing to do with the f...act that he’d been ill for the last couple of years. He’d always been the same. Sometimes, sitting several feet away, I’d spot him apparently beginning to re-enact the moves from the video for the 1997 remix of Run DMC’s ‘It’s Like That’ single; then I’d be able to rush over in time to thrust a used broadsheet newspaper or cardboard box in front of his face and avert disaster. But a person couldn’t reasonably be expected to be on vomit stakeout 24/7. At least on this occasion he’d been considerate enough to puke outdoors.

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